Anthony Noguera: Is that why you hardly said a word until after lunch yesterday?
Jennifer Lopez: Hey listen, that was early in the morning for me! Because I've been recording an album I've been spending all night in the studio, so I don't get up till around midday. I can't even form a sentence until the afternoon, ha ha! And you had me at the studio at ten, which meant that I was up at 9.30am. My assistant woke me up every ten minutes from 8.30 to 9.30, with me going, "Please, please, just a few minutes more!"
Anthony Noguera: Were you a mischievous child?
Jennifer Lopez: I was never naughty, but I was a tomboy and very athletic. I'd always be running around and playing sports and stuff. But I was a good kid. I was always hugging people. I was very close to my grandparents and I listened to my mother and didn't do bad things. I didn't curse and I didn't run around. My mother was very strict.
Anthony Noguera: Did you do any crappy jobs to support yourself in the old days?
Jennifer Lopez: There were times when I was really down to my last dollar. And then my last 50 cents... and then my last quarter. It was like that a lot until I moved out to LA and got a part on In Living Color. I'd dance in a piece-of-garbage rap or pop video for 50 bucks and make the money last a whole month. I was in a Janet Jackson video once - but that was when things were a little better.
Anthony Noguera: When was the last time you had a fist-fight?
Jennifer Lopez: Fourth grade. I was nine. I'm not a violent person. Women hitting each other is low class, and it looks ridiculous and stupid. But I can, and would, defend myself if I had to. I'm not going down without a fight- that's for sure. I started that fight in fourth grade, but I've matured since then. There were these two best friends and I started getting on with one of them. The other one got jealous, so she told me that the other girl was always talking about me. In the end, I confronted her; she denied it, so I pushed her in the face. We started fighting and I knocked her down. It was pretty ugly, and although I'm not proud of the event, I did win the fight. Nobody ever messed with me after that, and I graduated from school unscathed.
Anthony Noguera: You posterior seems to come in for an inordinate amount of attention. In face, one American magazine this month describes it as your "magnificent derriere"...
Jennifer Lopez: God, people talk about my butt all the time. It's because it's big. It's not huge and disgusting or anything, but when I was younger I had a bit of a complex about it, because it is definitely big. So in my earlier interviews I'd bring it up - perhaps as some kind of defense. And in every picture taken of me now at movie premieres, they always photo me from behind, looking over my shoulder. But it's fine. I don't care. I hear they like big women in England. I'm not one of those people who has a problem with their body. Although I do hate my ankles - they're too skinny. In proportion to the rest of my body, they look too small. Do you think there's anything wrong with my body?
Anthony Noguera: Nothing about you disgusts me.
Jennifer Lopez: Good. But look how skinny my ankles are. My mom's are too, but she's in better proportion than me. I have a big butt and skinny ankles. Luckily I like the way my body is shaped, proportion wise. I'm not too big on top, and I have a decent sized waist. I have what you'd call a "womanly" figure, and I like that.
Anthony Noguera: What do you look for in a man's appearance?
Jennifer Lopez: A man's mouth area is very important to me. Like if they don't have a nice smile and nice lips and nice teeth, then that really disgusts me. I hate unhygienic mouths. And I love nice eyes. And I like a nice toned body. He doesn't have to be all cut up, and he doesn't have to be huge, but he does have to be in shape. I like somebody who takes care of himself. But more than anything I don't like bad teeth.
Anthony Noguera: And are men sexier in the buff, or when they're hiding their wares in a pair of loose boxers?
Jennifer Lopez: It depends what kind of mood I'm in. Sometimes it's sexier if they just walk around in their underwear. And sometimes it's better if they don't have underwear on, ha ha!
Anthony Noguera: Do you think men got the short straw looks wise when God was giving out genitals?
Jennifer Lopez: Yeah, men have lumps and bits. The meat and veggies, ha ha! The legumes! Oh God, actually I don't have any problems with the meat and two veggies. I don't find them ugly. At all.
Anthony Noguera: Are you a good flirt?
Jennifer Lopez: Pretty good. I think the best flirts are people who are not too obvious. When you're overly flirty, that's off-putting. You've just got to be friendly. If I like a guy, then I'll be very friendly with him. I'll talk to him and laugh a lot, look in his eyes a second longer than I should. You know - the kind of things that let a guy know that you're interested in him. And I'm very touchy-feely with people I know, so you can't tell that I like someone just because I touch him a lot. But I've never gone up to a complete stranger and asked him out on a date. Chasing after guys just isn't my style.  
Anthony Noguera: What are you like as a girlfriend?
Jennifer Lopez: I'm a giver, almost to a fault. I like a lot of love and affection. I don't need someone to buy me material things. I can buy them for myself. It's nice to get presents, but it's not a sign of love. Love to me is someone telling me, "I want to be with you for the rest of my life, and if you needed me to I'd jump out of a plane for you."
Anthony Noguera: What bad habits do men have?
Jennifer Lopez: I hate the male bonding thing. Women don't need that constant bonding. Sure, it's nice to hang out with our friends, but we'd much rather be with our boyfriends. Men have some disgusting habits, as well - like scratching themselves all the time. And it's weird how guys think that passing gas is the funniest thing in the world. They love to do that kind of thing in front of girls and laugh about it. It's disgusting, and I don't need it in my life.
Anthony Noguera: How long do you have to be in a relationship before you'll pass wind in front of your partner?
Jennifer Lopez: A long time. But the guy is usually blowing you away a long time before that. I'm sure there's something to be said for not doing that kind of stuff in front of your partner. Like, don't go to the bathroom in front of each other. People get comfortable with each other and they end up treating them like their brother or sister instead of their lover.
Anthony Noguera: What is your favorite of the five senses?
Jennifer Lopez: I'm a very smell-orientated person. I can be attracted to a man almost by the way he smells. Everybody has their own smell. I love the smell of a man, when you're holding someone in bed, just the smell of the back of their neck - you just kinda put your nose in there and there might be just a little trace of Cologne left. I love that.
Anthony Noguera: FHM's Grub Smith believes a man's natural sweat odour is a huge aphrodisiac...
Jennifer Lopez: What, that really sweaty smell? No way, that's gross! If you stink, stay away from me.
Anthony Noguera: He'll be very disappointed. When did you have your first crush?
Jennifer Lopez: Third grade. A kid called Charles who had blue eyes and black hair. He was so cute. I never kissed him because I was only ten years old. He'd come over to my house every day and my mom would give us sandwiches and milk. I dreamt of marrying him. I saw him years later when he'd grown up, and let's put it this way - he peaked early.
Anthony Noguera: How did you bust your nose?
Jennifer Lopez: I was 13 when a truck carrying compressed gas cylinders hit my mom's car. The only thing that saved my life was the fact that I was bending down tying my shoes in the front seat, because his headlight flew through the windscreen and ended up in the back of the car. It would have smashed my face in. I don't even remember exactly how my nose got fractured, but that's why it looks like it does. People always tell me I look like I was hit with a hammer, but I like my nose. In profile it's good, but if you look straight at me or touch it, you can see the flatness.
Anthony Noguera: What are you like when you're drunk?
Jennifer Lopez: I don't drink. I've nothing against it, but I guess I just never started.
Anthony Noguera: You should try it. It's really good.
Jennifer Lopez: Well, I have had a drink. Sometimes I have a little bit on planes, but in general I don't drink. I don't need to get drunk to enjoy myself - I'm the type of person who's uninhibited all the time. When I go out. I'm ready to have fun - I don't need to have a drink to get in the mood. You know what I mean?
Anthony Noguera: No. Beer is good.
Jennifer Lopez: Ha ha! Well I don't know what drinking one feels like. And no, I don't want to try one now. You're a bad influence.
Anthony Noguera: Is there any sexual advice you'd like to share with our male readers?
Jennifer Lopez: Yeah! Women don't like their nipples being twiddled like radio tuners! Don't be a knob turner. You think, "She seems to love it", and she's thinking, "God, would you please stop!"
Anthony Noguera: And finally, what constitutes infidelity to you?
Jennifer Lopez: I really believe in fidelity. That's not to say I don't understand that you might be in love with somebody but find someone else attractive. It can happen to anyone, no matter how faithful you are. I think it's difficult to pinpoint exactly when someone is being physically unfaithful. Getting a blow-job or having intercourse or kissing - when are you actually crossing the line? To me, when you're sharing your life with with someone and then you start having feelings for someone else, then that's infidelity. I'm faithful.

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